The Donkey and the Rider: Why Mindful Meditation Exercises Won't Lead You to What You Already Are

We often find ourselves in a peculiar state of distraction, much like the old story of the man searching everywhere for his donkey while he is already sitting on its back. We look for peace, we look for clarity, and we look for some ultimate truth as if it were a hidden treasure buried in a distant land. But who is the one looking? And where could this truth possibly be hiding if it is not already here? We have become so accustomed to the movement of the separate self that we have forgotten how to simply be. We treat our existence as a project to be finished, a puzzle to be solved, or a ladder to be climbed. Yet, when we look closely at the nature of this search, we find that the seeker itself is the very thing obscuring the view. In our daily lives, we might engage in various mindful meditation exercises to find a moment of respite. This is perfectly fine. At the level of the body-mind, this stillness have a function. We can feel the muscles relax, the breath become more rhythmic, and the nervous system settle into a state of relative calm. We see how stress impacts the immune system and how a bit of quiet can help the body-mind function with more harmony. There is a horizontal line of improvement where we learn to navigate the challenges of life, from the smallest frustration to the finality of death. In this horizontal dimension, we can refine our attention and develop a certain intelligence in how we relate to our environment. But we must be very clear: none of this has anything to do with the absolute. None of this brings us closer to what we already are. The separate self loves the idea of a journey. It thrives on the notion that if it just practices enough, if it just attends enough retreats or masters enough mindful meditation exercises, it will eventually achieve a state called enlightenment. But liberation is not something that happens to the "me." It is not a trophy for the separate self to put on its mantle. In fact, liberation is not of the self, but from the self. It is the realization that the one who thinks they are making progress is an appearance within the very totality they are trying to find. How can a wave "attain" the ocean? The wave is already the ocean, whether it is crashing violently against the shore or shimmering in a moment of stillness. The movement of the wave doesn't change its essence as water. Similarly, whether we are distracted or focused, whether we are suffering or in bliss, we are the absolute. When we sit together in silence, we aren't doing it to get somewhere. We aren't waiting for a bell to ring that signals our arrival at the finish line of spirituality. We are simply allowing that person inside who is always expecting something from the next moment to step aside. We let go of the "tizio," that character who is constantly checking the clock or wondering if they are doing it right.